My Acceptance Speech

I would like to take this moment to accept this award on behalf of being great and knowingly favored. I would have to say that it’s a gift and a curse. I’ve practiced so long at being bad in order to get good in so many areas of my life. First, great thanks go out to my practice dummies, without you all I truly could not have made it to this level of greatness, I would not have the aura of clarity in situations to distinguish the learned lessons, and I would not be able to realize in minute or humongous moments how truly favored I am. Because of you Miss Jaunty got skills!!! I’m quicker in discerning the lesson in dash encounters; more humble in my lively living; able to recognize the evidence of ill will in just a gaze; able to read people in order to understand them more; capable of performing acts that build from my creative genius instead of unearthed gifts, and competent enough to know what is for me and what is not for me.

Now don’t get offended, I don’t mean practice dummy in a derogatory manner. So you must see if from my angle. There were lessons I needed to learn, experiments I needed to execute, and curiosities I needed to disengage in order to satisfy my taste buds. Then along came you and viola!, I had someone to practice on. You were used by me to practice on because I needed the practice to become who I am. The context of dummy does not discredit your intellect; it is simply analogous of the fact that you had no clue that you were only being used for methods of executing close perfection. I am truly sorry practice dummies that you will not be able to benefit from my blessedness. I am so apologetic that you are stuck in a rut and you take no responsibility for your life’s actions. I apologize that your unhappiness has no effect on hindering my success. I’ve been forgiven already for using you as my practice dummies. Maybe it’s time for you to find a practice dummy so you can accept this award on behalf of being great and knowingly favored.


Paradigm of Parodies: Paradise, Peril, and Peace by ACE Jaunty is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Obvious stupidity

I’m sorry but this is just obvious stupidity that we are witnessing [in reference to overpaid individuals who don’t have a clue].


Paradigm of Parodies: Paradise, Peril, and Peace by ACE Jaunty is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

My Blackberry

Years from now I’m sure there will be something better than a Blackberry cell phone. But right now, Blackberry is where it is at. I can not sit and tell you what makes this phone so much better than my past phones…I’ve had Samsung, Sanyo, LG, Treo, and Motorola…but they do not compare to my Blackberry. It could be the $300 price tag that I paid for this phone off of eBay that requires me to use it every waking moment to get my money’s worth. Even when I wake in the middle of the night from sleep; normal people check the time…but not me, I check my blackberry for missed text messages, emails, or scroll through my media files stored on the 2 GB micro SD card in my blackberry. “Why?” you ask. My reply is the same, “why?” I think it would be safe to say that my phone stores memories and gives new memories that make me look back and smile at life. Of course, could other phones provide me with GPS, pictures, text, email, games, international usage, internet, and certainly placing a call…of course!!! But the Blackberry is just sweet and the blacker the berry; the sweeter the juice.

:)


Paradigm of Parodies: Paradise, Peril, and Peace by ACE Jaunty is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.