I am never alone

[performed at my first Spoken Word segment in of all places church (St. Paul Missionary Baptist Church on 5/24/2009]

Seems like I’m always crying because I’m alone
Seems like I can never have the one that I want
Just when I thought it would all be better to know who would be my own
That’s when the tears got worse
Because I can’t have him in my own time
Oh God, it hurts so bad
Why’d you have to tell me
I know I asked, but I really didn’t wanna know
Now I know and I can’t have him
I know and I can’t be with him
I know and I can’t check my emotions
I know I can’t live alone
I know I don’t want to be by myself anymore
I know that no other man will do
Everyone around me’s getting married and having kids
And no me because I’m all alolne
God, I’m tired of living on my own
I’m tired of doing it on my own
God why’d you tell me when you knew I couldn’t have him
God why’d you show me when you knew it wasn’t time
God why do I have to deal this and no one else knows
Why can’t you give him the words to tell me from his lips that he know what you showed me
God I can’t do this alone anymore
I’m strong, but I am too weak
God I know what you want me to do
But it’d seem so much easier if I truly had him behind me
God I can’t take it anymore; please take away my emptiness
I can’t be by myself;
I can’t sleep by myself anymore
I know I can’t;
I’m just looking up for you to help me God
I need you;
I need you God to help me grow up and grow out
Because it is your work that I need to be doing
I this now because you haven’t given me my mate
There’s more that you have to change in me
There’s more that I have to LET YOU change in me
To prepare me for the next stage of my life
God if I trusted you to tell me my mate
I have to trust you with my wait
I’m trusting you with my emotions, my steps and my decisions
By giving you total control over my house
I know I’m not what I used to be
But I’m getting to where you need me to be
I know you are here in me
Because the state I’m in now is different than before
I’m living with you God
I know I have to focus on one life
And I’m aligning my life with you to make it one
Through my tears and my weakness
My God, you are my strength
And with time,
Just in time
I know you will give me all that I need and desire
Because with you I am never alone
I am NEVER alone



Paradigm of Parodies: Paradise, Peril, and Peace by ACE Jaunty is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License